Monday, June 25, 2012

Poor Being a State of Mind

I'm trying to ride out my spending splurge.

It was/is planned, and I'm in no danger of losing my job, but I continue to have mild panic attacks about it.

BUT... my Rock Shed, aka 'Deepholm' is coming in two weeks.

How cute is that??

And after, the plan is to get my saw.

And then the spending will STOP. All my summer classes will pay for the saw and the rest towards taxes for teaching those 4 weeks of classes.

I think the way I worry about money in a very similar to the way I worry about my weight.

I fret after every single meal, every time I get on the scale before a shower. Heck, I fret during my meal, when hunger usually wins over the 'second helping and an after meal handful of nuts' fret! A 1/2 tsp. of sugar in my coffee? Yep, then too. And yet, to just about everyone that sees me, I'm not overweight at all. True, maybe constant fretting has kept me within 5# of my ideal weight, but mentally, it's exhausting. And not fun.

I wonder how much healthier it would be on all levels, to relish and enjoy the bites I DO take?

I find I'm the same way about money. My recent rock splurges have that same base 'WANT' that my second helpings do. Like scratching an itch. And then I beat myself up for it. True, these last few months I've been spending more than I bring in, but I also have a tiny bit in savings to cover it, and no bills will be left unpaid.

True, I have and use a home equity line of credit that I got to replace my leaking roof, and YES, I'm putting my shed on it too, and all of it will be paid off now in less than a year. Do I lose my Frugal Membership because I use credit? Will I be booted out when I get a new car to replace my 20+ year old truck in a couple of years and not pay cash??

Dear Universe, please don't let me turn into the little old lady that lives with one lightbulb on and no heating, and moans about not having money, then dies with tens of thousands of dollars in the bank.


1 comment:

The Skipping Schipperke said...

Really cute shed!

And your worrying only shows me that you are at least thinking about responsibilities - and that's more than some people can say.

But hopefully your shed can help relieve some stress and let you enjoy the things you love in life!